Serina Calhoun has worked as an architect in San Francisco for 21 years and has faced plenty of headache-inducing projects, but the renovation of a Bernal Heights fixer-upper that she took on in 2020 stands out as truly atrocious.

Many of the city’s worst story lines converged at the seemingly cursed house, leaving Calhoun and the home’s owners slack-jawed by all the plot twists.

It involves insanely high real estate prices. Byzantine planning codes that even the city’s planners find confusing. Neighbors who demand a say in any change near them. Squatters, drugs and vandalism. Police officers who blame the district attorney as they let criminals go. A pricey private security guard. And heaps of frustration.

Sounds like San Francisco, alright.

“This is a whole other level of crazy,” Calhoun said.

It all began in October 2020 when Jennifer Sun and her husband, Ben, purchased a house in Bernal Heights for $1.75 million. In most parts of the country, that would buy a stunning mansion. In San Francisco, it buys a rather dated fixer-upper.

The couple are wealthy, and nobody but them will shed any tears over their home remodel gone awry. Still, what happened next points to what’s broken in San Francisco — and so much is broken.

A sticker, writing on the refrigerator and a sign are some of the damage left over from squatters who trespassed and lived in the home of a Bernal Heights couple.

Lea Suzuki/The Chronicle

The couple hired Calhoun to design a remodel, submitted their plans in March 2021 and hoped to secure permits within six months. They kept paying rent on their South of Market apartment so they could live there during the remodel, while also paying their new mortgage.

But six months turned into 12 months — and still, no permits.

The first hiccup was that the Planning Department said the home had been illegally converted into three units by a previous owner, and the couple wanted to restore it to its original single-family home set-up.

After some back and forth, the Planning Department said the plan was allowable because there was no record of any tenants ever living there.

Dan Sider, chief of staff for the Planning Department, said planners were ready to approve the plans including major interior work in July 2021, but then the couple submitted a proposal with a new wrinkle: extending the back of their home by just under 3 feet . That would make the back of the house even since the third story juts out beyond the lower two.

But this being San Francisco, and especially Bernal Heights, that seemingly small change is a very big deal. That’s because of a “special use district” approved by the Board of Supervisors in 1991 that governs every little change to homes in the neighborhood. The idea was to preserve the area’s character, but the details will make your eyes glaze over and, according to Calhoun, have prompted many architects in the city to refuse to work there.

In sections and subsections to subsections, it governs changes to homes in minute detail — down to the allowable width of curb cuts and garage doors.

“I can assure you that it is not a page-turner,” Sider said good-naturedly.

Jennifer Sun stands below two holes in the ceiling of her home, part of the damage from squatters. She and her husband have had to hire private security while they wait for permits to remodel their new home.

Lea Suzuki / The Chronicle

A group of neighbors called the Bernal Heights East Slope Design Review Board — with no apparent website or easy way to find them — gets to weigh in on projects in the area. An email sent to an address associated with the group was not returned.

The rules include the length of a home can extend into the backyard from the front of its property line. But because the couple’s house sits on a curved lot, Calhoun’s been trying to get an answer on where on the front lot to start measuring from. She said she waited until November just to get a planner assigned and has spoken to four different planners about the 3-foot extension, and that none knows the answer.

“They shared that the code is confusing even for them,” she said.

Then, the planner told Calhoun the home was historic and the facade — though nondescript — could not be altered. Sorting that out would have extended the project by another six to nine months, Calhoun said, so the couple dropped proposed changes to the front.

Then things got really weird.

In February, Calhoun received an email from a member of the Bernal Heights East Slope Design Review Board who reported a neighbor across the street from the couple’s home had grown “increasingly agitated” by the couple’s lifestyle and the cars coming and going from the home at every hour.

Sun said she was shocked. They weren’t living there. What cars? What lifestyle?

So they visited the property, which had weird spray paint across the garage door and signs of people inside. They called police, who accompanied them inside the house where they found squatters had taken it over.

Photos the couple took show piles of furniture, clothes and a fridge full of food. Graffiti covers the refrigerator and walls. One message can’t be relayed in full because of antigay language, but it reads in part, “No soliciting. No shopping. No snitches.” They bashed holes in the walls and ceilings, wrecked a sink and other fixtures, left dog poop on the carpets and discarded needles and syringe caps around the house. Flies were everywhere. The house still smells bad.

According to the couple, police officers gave the squatters — all of whom appeared high — 10 minutes to collect their belongings and leave. They arrested only one. No one else faced any consequences. The couple said police explained there was nothing they could do because District Attorney Chesa Boudin “has different priorities right now” and wouldn’t prosecute.

Salar Naderi, a spokesperson with the Police Department, confirmed police found seven people occupying the house and arrested Richard Ostergard, 47, who had warrants for stealing a vehicle, possession of stolen property and theft. Naderi said the homeowners “did not want to have any of the (other) subjects cited or arrested,” disputing the couple’s version.

In any case, Sun, 36, said that just a few hours later, neighbors texted and called to tell her the squatters were back. And it doesn’t sound like they’re merely people down on their luck. Photos show nice belongings, and neighbors reported them driving a Mercedes, BMW and Dodge Durango.

Neighbors continued to report to the couple that people were entering the home over the next couple of days, and that someone tried to access the property with a crowbar.

The couple quickly hired a private security guard whom they’re paying $8,000 a month to watch over the house every night.

“If we had known the city would take so long, we would have moved in and this wouldn’t be an issue,” Sun said.

Even though they’re doing well professionally, the couple said the costs have created “an immense financial impact” — and work hasn’t even started yet. Mortgage payments and property taxes on the house have topped $180,000 so far. They paid $3,000 to haul away the squatters’ belongings and don’t know yet how much it will cost to repair their damage.

Meanwhile, construction costs keep growing because of inflation and supply chain shortages, and there’s no telling how much the remodel will end up costing or when they can finally start.

“How does anyone afford this?” Sun asked.

Sun said she’s no longer excited about moving in after the remodel — which she thinks won’t be done for another year at best.

“It totally creeps me out,” she said. “Just unlocking the door, I get goose bumps. It’s uncomfortable being in here. It’s so unnerving. This is supposed to be home.”

This being San Francisco, there is one bit of good news for the couple. Redfin says their dream home turned nightmare is now worth more than $2 million.

San Francisco Chronicle columnist Heather Knight appears Sundays and Wednesdays. Email: hknight@sfchronicle.com Twitter: @hknightsf

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SAN FRANCISCO (CBS SF) — In an apparent crime spree in San Francisco, several homes in different neighborhoods across the city were targeted by home invasion robbers within a few hours involving a gray Infiniti.

William Ton was at home with his mother on Jan. 4, when would-be intruders tried to break in through the front door on 31st Avenue in the Outer Richmond.

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“As you can see their goal was to get in through the lock opening here,” said Ton, showing KPIX 5 a photo of the damage.

Ton believes his dog Chewy ultimately deterred the crooks.

“He was barking and yelping the whole entire time and usually when he does that, we thought he was trying to bark at other dogs,” he said.

Around the same time, a neighbor’s ring camera a few houses down captured a gray Infiniti parked out front. A person gets out and walks up to the door and knocks.

“I could hear tools clanking in his jacket,” said Tom Hsieh said. “He went up and knocked on our neighbor’s door and this was all on our video. Thankfully, he didn’t get in, because they’re elderly shut-ins, they’re a great couple, but they’re old. They must have come to the door, because he went back to his car, and then hit our neighbor four or five doors up.”

“I’m shocked, around this neighborhood, it’s usually very quiet,” Ton said. “People around here are great, and for these guys to just come around and do what they please, and get away with it, it’s just crazy.”

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Security video just one street over on 30th Avenue and Fulton Street shows a gray Infiniti backing into the driveway of an apartment complex about 10 minutes later before noon.

Using what appears to be a tool, two suspects break the gate and then a third one follows. A resident who was home at the time said they hit three units in about 10 minutes. Video shows the suspects rushing out of the complex with bags in hand.

Earlier that same morning, about five miles away in the Outer Mission / Ingleside neighborhood, a gray Infiniti is seen backing into the driveway. Two sisters were inside at the time. The suspects broke the metal gate and forced their way in.

“I hid in the closet because I didn’t really know what to do. I was really scared,” said one of the sisters, who declined to give her name for privacy reasons.

Video shows three suspects wearing what appears to be the same clothes running into the getaway car with stolen items.

“They’re going into our homes like they’re going into our parked cars in the middle of the night, except they’re doing it in broad daylight,” said Hsieh. “They don’t care if we’re in those homes or not, they don’t care if there are seniors there or children there. They’re just going in and taking things. This is not acceptable at all at any level and San Francisco – all of us have to say enough is enough.”

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KPIX 5 have reached out to SFPD to see if they’re investigating these crimes as being related.

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A 55-year-old man died after crashing into a parked vehicle in South San Francisco over the weekend, police said Tuesday.

Officers responded to a report from someone on the street with an electric bike on the 600 block of Grand Avenue at 3:37 a.m. on Saturday and arrived to find the victim, police said was not breathing.

The man, identified as Luis Bermudez by the San Mateo County Coroner Office, was pronounced dead at the scene.

Investigators discovered the man was riding his bike west when he hit the parked car and was thrown to the ground. He was wearing a new type of helmet with no padding, and police said alcohol may have contributed to the crash.

Anyone with information on the case is asked to contact the Police Department at (650) 877-8900, a phone number at (650) 952-2244, or by email at web-pd@ssf.net or tips@ssf.net to call.

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